February 11th

Twenty years ago today, our son was born. Ten hours later, he died.

He was our fifth child and our third son. My pregnancy was very easy, I did not gain much weight.  I remember having energy to take care of our children, as well as homeschooling two of them.

I am not going to give details here … that is not the purpose of writing today.

I am writing because I want other moms (and dads) to realize that life does go on. If you are dealing with a child who is dying, a miscarriage, or your child has already died – I promise you … You will always remember your child. No one can take that away from you. You will not always hurt. One day, you will realize that you made it through the day, and you did not cry (and then you will probably feel guilty).  But, life does go on.

I remember with such clarity the peace of heart and mind that my Heavenly Father was so real … Troy & I were able to make decisions because we had so many people praying for us and with us throughout the entire weekend. I wish that I could put these memories to paper … maybe one day they will come out of my head clearly!

One thing I do remember more than anything else during that time, is that I remember singing hymns in my head over and over. Sometimes, I would find myself humming them or singing them out loud without realizing it. One of the hymns that was so helpful was “It Is Well with My Soul” by Horatio Spafford.

In closing, know that I am here, if you need to talk or someone to pray with!